Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Soul-utions

Soul-ution


I tried to figure out why I exist on this planet called, Earth. Many of us go through trial and tribulations and then try to make sense of what the hell is going on. My spirit is very noisy right now. All month I’ve been yearning for intimacy, but the truth of the matter I need to have it with the Lord. It’s very essential that I try to make that happen. My relationship with him would make me take off my mask and reveal who I am. I proclaim I am a hypocrite and what people see on the outside may not be the same picture that’s being drawn in the inside. It’s all about the moments with God but my soul was too noisy and busy for him.
I am now at a crossroad where the demons are tugging because they know I am preparing my self to be a full servant of God. How did I get to this place that is so damn lonely? I know God didn’t deem it that way! He never wants us to be lonely yet we only listen to our inner self and want to do what we want instead of what God wants. Maybe that’s why I am in this place, trying to breakout. The more intimate I get with God the more I die, I just recently realized. I have to channel in and find a way to get to God. Each of us has our own way to getting intimate with the Lord. He first has to saturate my wombs so that all of my history can not be detected and I have to believe he will do that because that’s the only way to be delivered. I proclaim today that I am a broken man waiting for my opportunity to be rebuilt. I feel the process taking place because of the thing that occurred this month. I’ve been shown my faults and I am desperately trying to make them right. It must be working because like I said earlier, the demons are back for me and this time they will not win. My strength is building and my mind is regaining its balance so I can do battle.